Posts Tagged 'lack of ambition'

How I Roll

Considering how I have no real game plan, never really knew exactly what I wanted to do, and have never worked tirelessly toward a singular big goal, I’m amazed at how content I am.  But the more I think about it, this may be exactly why I am so content.

When you know exactly what you want in life, there are two outcomes.  You either succeed, which may lead to incredible happiness, or disappointment that the outcome wasn’t as thrilling as you thought.  The other outcome is failure, which is pretty sure to result in disappointment and sadness.  Lots of chances for unhappiness here.

In my breezy bouncy world, I just  go with the flow.  I have ideas about what I might be happy doing, but I don’t have any expectations.  I kind of just go for the ride that life is taking me.  I often expect the worst but hope for the best, so I’m never unprepared for a spot of bad luck.  And I’m often pleasantly surprised by the unexpected joys!

No doubt, if you live life this way, you will probably never be like Donald Trump or Oprah Winfrey.  They’re just too focused on what they want and go after it.  I admire people like this but I am on the opposite end of the spectrum.  I focus on what I DON’T want to happen, and then I do my best to avoid those outcomes.  I’m really pretty ambivalent about what I actually do want.

Spouse?  Wasn’t looking; had no game plan.  I never even knew if I wanted to get married.  Or not.  I just ended up caving in to a very persistent guy who really seemed to like me.  And I lucked out.  I got a good one.

Kids?  The best thing that ever happened to me.  Planned?  Not really.  I knew I didn’t want to have a child before I could properly care for one.  I took measures to make sure that didn’t happen.  But once we bought our first home, I guess we kind of relaxed.  Did we think we were ready?  No!  But I guess we were.

Lifestyle?  I have everything I need and most of what I want.  The only thing I really wanted was a home of my own.  Growing up in a crappy apartment, watching my parents pay for that place many times over yet never owning it did make me want a home of my own.  But I didn’t have any solid idea of what kind of home I wanted.  We only decided on the school district we wanted.  Our limited finances at the time and a motivated realtor determined the home that would be our first.  It was a perfect little brick ranch in a wonderful family neighborhood.  Much better probably than what I would have gone after if I ‘d had a preference of my own.

While it’s okay to let life carry you along, it’s important not to be careless.  You might not be looking for a spouse, but don’t surround yourself with losers.  You might not know what you want to spend your money on, but make sure you don’t spend every penny now and live beyond your means.  I had no idea what kind of career I wanted, but I knew I wanted to be able to support myself without having to go to graduate school, so I chose accounting without knowing anything about it.

If you like to be in control, if you know exactly what you want in life and have no desire to compromise on your dreams, this is not the way to live your life.  But for me, it works.  I like to see how my life unfolds.  I usually like the twists and turns in the road, and I usually don’t mind handling the challenges that I’m faced with.  And if something doesn’t work out, it’s not like it’s my fault.  I’m just hitching a ride.

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