Graduation Never

Okay.  I love my sons.  To pieces.  I’m not trying to kick them out of the house or anything.  But I do want them to finish college someday.  So they can start their grown-up lives.  And then proceed to buy a house say maybe a few doors down from us.

Youngest Son doesn’t seem to be a problem.  He’s already ahead of where he should be.  However, he wants to be a doctor or a dentist and so should be in school for like umpteen more years.

Oldest Son, he is a dilemma.  He’s the smartest person I know.  But he has a lot of trouble with the school thing.  If he doesn’t feel like doing an assignment, he just doesn’t do it.  He can ace just about any test out there, but unfortunately, most of his teachers handed out assignments that needed to be turned in.  I can’t even tell you how many teacher conferences I was called to discuss this mystery.  Was it ADHD, like some counselors diagnosed?  Or was it just boredom, like a few people suggested?  I couldn’t just assume he was lazy and then beat his ass like I felt like doing–maybe he really couldn’t help it.  But we tried everything; even a full scholarship couldn’t change his pattern.  The stupid Army was supposed to send him somewhere that would make full use of his potential but since one hand doesn’t know what the other one is doing, the plan changed.  Next week he is starting his third college, an online school.  He’s a whiz with computers but you pretty much need that piece of paper to get a good job.  I wanted him to go somewhere with hands-on training, like a technical school.  He’s very good with a structured environment, and you can’t really procrastinate in a hands-on type of school.  He’s a great worker and a creative thinker.  Just don’t ask him to write a damn paper.  I’m hoping the third time’s a charm, but he still needs a lot of credits to graduate.

Middle Son J just dropped a bombshell that he might not bother going to school this fall when he gets home from Germany.  I realize that he’s been away from home for a year, but the plan all along was to get back to school ASAP.  I spent a lot of time filling out his financial aid crap and reminding him to do what he needed to get back in there. It was his choice to postpone his education after his very first semester.  For some reason, he was insistent about joining the Army that spring even though we tried to talk him out of it.  J is very stubborn and when he decides to do something, there is no talking him out of it.  He has to learn every lesson the hard way.  After his months of basic training in Georgia and AIT in Texas, he finally finished up his freshman year the next spring.  Everything was in place to go back in the fall until the Army decided to ship him to Germany for a year.  At this point, he has more experience in his major than probably any of his fellow students, even upperclassmen.  But he still needs to finish the education.  And he wants to postpone it another semester.  It’s driving me crazy!

Boys, you don’t even have to move out once you graduate.  We kind of like having you around.  Just please freakin’ graduate!!!

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9 Responses to “Graduation Never”


  1. 1 Cyndi July 2, 2009 at 7:46 am

    LOL – I love hearing about what I have to look forward to. 🙂 I was much like your oldest. I did very well when I applied myself but applying myself happened only when I was extremely interested in a subject. I never finished college and, as you know, am now back in school at 39! Although, if that scared you, take comfort in knowing that I moved out when I was 22, supported myself and am paying for college myself. 🙂

    • 2 les@mamaneeds2rant July 2, 2009 at 9:13 am

      Wow, Cyndi. That’s encouraging. You’ve done really well for yourself. I had no idea you didn’t you didn’t graduate the first time around. I guess maybe it’s not so bleak here after all 🙂

  2. 3 Cyndi July 2, 2009 at 9:38 am

    Well, it certainly would have been easier to have finished when I was single, in my twenties and had no kids! If only they would just LISTEN to us instead of having to learn the hard way, like I did. 🙂

    • 4 les@mamaneeds2rant July 2, 2009 at 9:45 am

      I know. It’s so frustrating. But–everyone I know that went back to school when they were older graduated near the top of their class. I guess if you really want something bad enough, you work harder. And to go back to school when you have all those other responsibilities shows that you really want to do this.

  3. 5 Chrissy July 2, 2009 at 10:31 am

    Oh Mama. I feel your pain. Oldest & I used to push each other about getting school work done. “Go do your math.” “Pssh. When you finish that paper, I will.” “Alright..” Haha! He really needs motivation. I hope whichever girl he ends up with next can help you push him in the right direction! I was at the same loss you were. I’m so proud of Youngest! He’s turning out just as awesome as I knew he’d be the first time I met him! But Middle needs a whack on the head. He’s a really smart guy! No sense putting off tomorrow what you can do today, Middle!

    • 6 les@mamaneeds2rant July 2, 2009 at 11:50 am

      Thanks, Chrissy. I kind of miss having that other woman around that would help push Oldest Son in the right direction. I’m too old for this and I’ve officially retired from that job. And, in the end, it’s got to be important enough to get it done on your own.

  4. 7 robinaltman July 3, 2009 at 10:05 am

    My stomach acid overflows just reading this. I vote you get a special award just for not losing your mind. This would drive me bananas. But there are certain people that just need to learn from experience, and can’t just take the advice of people who’ve gone through it all. The good news is, that they usually do really well in life. So, I’m hoping the punchline is that all the boys will do great.

    There’s always the taser. . .

  5. 9 Nikith August 13, 2009 at 1:59 am

    I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often. Recently I found onecollege which is offers beyond-the- classroom experience to students in the rapidly-expanding industries of Health Care, Criminal Justice, Business, and Computers. Don’t miss out on great career opportunities.


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