Archive for June 30th, 2008

A Most Important Question..Does He Do Vomit?

When thinking about whether you should marry a potential spouse, a very important question should be considered before making a commitment. Especially if there are certain things you just can’t do. Like handle vomit.

I really just lucked out because Big Daddy has a much stronger stomach than I when it comes to gross bodily functions. I didn’t really think about it before we married except for the fact that I thought it was sweet that he did actually hold my hair out of the way more than once when I was blowing chunks and then still married me even after seeing me in such a state. And I did notice that he rarely ever pukes himself, which may have scored some subconscious points.

Once you get married and have a family, you are going to have to deal with vomit. So you may as well decide whether the issue is important enough to set guidelines. I didn’t think about it before we had kids but when he insisted on getting the dog, I let him know up front that he would handle all the gross stuff since he’s the one that wanted her. (Of course, when he’s not home, I have to gag through clean-up myself).

Tonight, I’m finally relaxing in front of the TV doing a Sudoku. And Youngest Son notices our Boxer, Sky, walking kind of weird. Then I see a spit bubble coming from her mouth. Before we could figure out what’s wrong, she pukes in front of my chair. Then, the entire rest of her dinner ends up in the next room on her way out to the porch. And I fetched Big Daddy from downstairs, because after all, he wanted her.

“Looks like a small animal,” he said about the last huge pile, as he got the clean up bucket. I went to another part of the house, because I didn’t want to gag anymore.

So remember, before you have kids, before you get a pet, get it in writing if you need to. If you hate vomit like I hate vomit, make sure your spouse is on board with cleaning up the messes.

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Could Things Actually Be Working Out Right?

I’m a believer in Murphy’s Law.  If things can go wrong, they certainly will. This is especially true when you think things are going smoothly.  I usually expect the worst, and then I am pleasantly surprised when things actually turn out a tad better.  That’s how I live my life.

I met my husband the night I was determined to lay off guys for a while.  I’ve screwed up tests I thought I aced, and aced tests I thought I failed.  Actually, when I feel cocky, I get scared.

That’s why, even now, I’m not counting 100% that Soldier Son will be home within the next couple days.  There are still too many things that could go wrong.  The army could decide it made a mistake.  Another sandstorm could delay his departure.  I’m not getting my hopes up until I actually see him in the flesh.  What is even more amazing is the timing.  He was supposed to come home on leave in a few weeks.  By then, however, his brother would have already left for his year-long deployment to Europe and they would have missed each other again.  But, all of a sudden, and with no warning, they moved up Soldier Son’s leave date so he will actually be home before his brother has to leave.  He’ll be home with us to celebrate the Fourth of July with the whole family, by the pool.  That is, if Murphy’s Law doesn’t screw things up.


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